Guys and space

Okay, I know guys need their space and bla bla bla but I really don't mean to rage. Well, not obsessively anyway. So as you probably know I'm dating this guy and his name starts with P. And there's all these issues about us going long distance and the other day we finally spoke about it and we are going to be breaking up when he leaves the country. So I was upset that day and every day after that, whenever I thought about it and would cry a lot.

So I was over at his place last night and left today and spoke to him on the phone a couple of hours later and made sure he had dinner ( I know right, I'm too much of a good housewife/girlfriend) and damn, I do treat him too good. When I spoke to him, I told him how much I missed him and every time our conversation goes the same way with him saying 'already? But it's only been a couple of hours'. Obviously, this is not the way to win a girl's heart but at least he's honest.

After that though, I have to say I miss him significantly less and am not at all bothered that I won't be speaking to him tomorrow. And to be honest, I don't really care about whether or not he goes hungry now either - if he doesn't want me to care so much about him I won't. So on the one hand, I'm glad that he feels that way because it's going to make the separation way easier I think and at least now, I'm not going to sacrifice anymore activities of mine, just to make time for him and for me to see him. I realise now that although it probably wasn't stupid of me...oh I lie, it probably was, but at least this way we're more on equal terms and so glad that he's making me miss him less.

Another reason why he's so goddam lucky to have me - I've been preparing his meals and cooking for him A LOT. And driving all the way to his place which is about 1.5hours drive and buying all these groceries and creating care packages for him to snack on when he works late - omg...I seriously would be such a great wife. Not that I'm saying 'Fuck that' but I kinda am. If there's one thing I've learnt in the past hour is that girls should not EVER sacrifice themselves and their time for the one boy - no matter how great or amazing you think they are. Because boys have lives beyond relationships (mainly work but also friends), girls should too otherwise I think that's how the whole thing ends up not 50/50. And so, my next steps is to just chill about our relationship and won't call him etc. I say that now and I truly mean it because I'm not missing him and am kind of annoyed that it was so one sided before but at least this way, I think he'll end up missing me and then the world will be back at its equilibrium.

xox